Can a doctor and a patient become friends?


Dear Amy: I am a happily married, 54-year-old woman. I have a great primary medical provider.

“Rebecca” is a nurse practitioner in a large practice. I’ve been going to her for about four years.

Rebecca is personable, interesting, authentic, and has an easy and fun sense of humor. She asks about my family, vacations, etc., and seems to just be a good person.

From day one, I leave every medical appointment wanting to be friends with her. We just seem to have a compatible energy and sort of “click.”

At my most recent pre-op appointment, she greeted me with a huge smile and a very enthusiastic, “I’m SO glad you’re finally able to have this surgery! I’m SO happy for you!”

I have no idea if this is just her typical “bedside manner,” but I was quite touched.

I have a good group of girlfriends, and I deeply value friendship as one of life’s great joys.

If Rebecca were not my doctor, I would invite her to coffee, and be open to either making a new friend — or not.

But given the boundaries of this relationship, is there any way to figure out if we could be friends, or if this is just how she is with all her patients?

And ethically, CAN a doctor and patient become friends?

If so, it would be worth switching to a different provider in the practice, but I don’t want to make that switch for nothing.


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